Toxic Relationship Spread by wassupwitches
This spread can be used to gain insight into a toxic relationship. Toxic relationships take many forms, but a relationship is probably toxic if it makes you feel bad about yourself, forces you to do things against your will, or physically/emotionally harms you in any way. Hopefully, this spread will help you understand how this relationship is effecting you, and what you can do to free yourself. I do want to preface this by saying that this is a spread for introspection and personal growth, but it in no way implies that the abuse you’ve suffered from this relationship is your fault. I only seek to offer you a lens through which to view your situation which may offer new perspective, insight, and empowerment.
1. Why was I attracted to this person? Oftentimes, when you recognize a negative relationships in your life, it causes you to wonder how you ever wanted to be with that person in the first place. We may blame ourselves for poor judgement, but resist that urge and, instead, acknowledge that this person came into your life for a reason. This card represents that parts of that person that were attractive or important to you when first getting close to them. This card may help you recognize patterns in your life. For example, do you tend to go after exciting, impulsive people who later put you in dangerous situations?
2. How do their actions hurt me/in what ways are they toxic? This card will represent the smaller, day-to-day effects of their presence. This should offer insight into why you feel so bad when you’re with them, and the tactics that they use to control and harm you.
3. What may be the long-term negative impact of this relationship? Whether you keep this person in your life or not, there will most likely be an impact on you in the long-term. This card will represent the potential negative effects that you will have to grapple with in the future. If you receive a positive card in this slot, it can mean a few different things: there will be no negative impact if you separate yourself from them, you may have a hard time achieving those good/positive things as a result, etc, just use your intuition.
4. How can I protect myself from them/what advice should I follow? This is an important card. It may show you what skills and tools are already at your disposal that you can use to break the cycle of abuse, or it may point you toward some skills that must be further developed for your own benefit. Either way, it will offer insight into how you can protect yourself in this specific situation, and from future ones that may arise.
5. How can I turn this situation into a positive opportunity for growth/what lessons will this experience teach me? All situations, especially harmful ones, offer a chance to learn and grow. While it does not mean you should seek out negative relationships, you can take this bad situation and turn it around for your personal betterment. This card will represent the knowledge that you will gain as a result of this toxic relationship. Pay attention to these lessons as they may help you deal with negative people you encounter in the future. Again, I want to reiterate that this slot is not implying that harmful relationships are positive, but just offers a way to see how this experience will help you grow.
Important note: If you are in an abusive or unsafe situation, please seek out help! Safe Horizon has a resource page with confidential hotlines that can assist you, and if you are in immediate danger, please call 911!
I hope this spread is helpful to you! Use and share as you will, but please do not remove credit.
(via recreationalwitchcraft)
